I used to keep it brutally honest with my closest friends. That’s what friends are for, right? Your REAL friends are supposed to be the ones to tell you the things that the rest of the world will keep from you and possibly ridicule you for. Your REAL friends will supposedly always look out for you, giving you 100% honesty at ALL times because ultimately, this is what sets them apart from the rest of the fake friends, random associates and leeches that the world offers.
Well, I don’t do/give the REAL friend brutal honesty anymore. Yup, I said it. After a long talk with Shelby one day, I recognized the faultiness in my previous outlook. Sometimes, our closest friends aren’t ready for that realness or are not willing to accept the changes that must occur once they’ve received that honesty.
We all have that friend that may dress inappropriately, may speak a bit out of turn, may be committed to that wack boyfriend, etc. Heck, maybe you are that friend! When someone who is truly in your corner comes to you and keeps it real with you, how much is it really going to change? Is that friend really going to purchase a new, more tasteful, wardrobe? Is the other friend really going to make an honest effort to gain better control over her tongue? Will that last friend really ditch her boyfriend she’s MADLY in love with as a result of that heart-to-heart conversation you had with her of his multiple shortcomings? No!
As a result, I now do my best to be a SUPPORTIVE friend. While yes, I’m honest in the fact that I won’t lie, I’m no longer so set on being brutally honest. Now when the inappropriately dressed friend is griping about the negative attention her way of dressing is attracting, I’m there to harp with her on how disrespectful men these days can be. While yes, her skirt is shorter than anything I’d dare wearing, I also understand it gives no man any permission to smack her backside as a result (while reminding her to try rocking skinny jeans like I did next time). When the friend that frequently speaks out of turn is salty that she’s recently gotten into a tiff with her grandmother, I provide a listening ear for a venting voice. And lastly, when that friend is complaining about the latest idiotic deed her wack boyfriend completed, I will agree with her about how wack it was and plot with her on how she can get him to see the error in his ways.
As you should know by now, I’m all about making my life, and the lives around me, happier, more positive places to be and enjoy. Brutal honesty oftentimes hurts feelings and offends more often than it incites change and brings people closer together. I’m all about increasing the peace and if this will help us get there, I’m down for the cause!